Watching William

I could spend all day watching William play. If he finds something interesting to play with, he'll be at it for at least half an hour--especially if it's something he hasn't played with before. More often than not, he prefers to play with things that aren't toys, like the hand mixer, the hobo pie maker, flower pots filled with dirt, empty bottle and caps--you get the picture. One of the things that keeps him occupied the most, though, is anything that is long, pliant, and flexible, like an electrical cord, plastic tubing, or belts, for example. Of course, these aren't things that I would let him "play" with unsupervised, but he is so interested in manipulating these objects and testing their properties that I feel compelled to let him explore under careful supervision. He loves to drag them behind him, put them over his head or over his shoulders, eat them, throw them. It seems like an odd obsession--why does he like to drape them over his head, shoulders, and neck--but there could be worse, I suppose. I love it that he gets so completely absorbed when he's exploring his "toys." I'd like to think that he's learning a lot--that lots of synapses are firing away in his brain, creating more and more connections. The best part is when he looks up at me every so often and sees me watching him and gives me that great big adorable grin.

This afternoon he climbed into the small club chair in our bedroom (with a little help from me) and was pleased as punch to be there. He had been playing with a belt and brought the belt with him in his chair. I took a bunch of pictures (practicing my photography--not much improvement unfortunately) and got a series of him smiling. I thought they were pretty cute.





By the way, my birthday turned out to be really really good. Ed came to my office and took me out to lunch, and he brought home a fruit tart lit with 36 glowing candles (including one to grow on!), and our new neighbor gave me a bottle of wine. Who could ask for more than that? I'm thinking my 36th year of life won't turn out half bad, either!

Happy Birthday to Me!

In my last post, I mentioned my 100 Things to Do in 100 Days list, and I've decided that rather than posting my accomplished feats on this blog, I would create a whole new blog dedicated just to my list! So here's the link: 100 Things to Do in 100 Days: http://beth-100thingstodoin100days.blogspot.com/

I figured creating a whole new blog for my venture would help motivate me even more. It's a lot of pressure to know your audience is waiting each day with baited breath to see what you've accomplished. Don't want to let down the masses!

In other news, I'm 35 years old today and not very thrilled about it. I feel old. I can't say I'm "young" anymore. I'm closer to middle aged now. How weird is that. In most ways, though, I'm right where I want to be in my life, and that is a good thing. And if celebrating your birthday means celebrating the past year of your life, I have much for which to celebrate. My 35th year of life was one of the most challenging, but also by far the most gratifying. There are many things that I have this year that I didn't have last year, including new friends (moms like me with kids the same age--both in cyber space and in real life), a new house, and best of all, a full year of William! What could be better than that. So Happy Happy Birthday to Me!

Picture Time

I have an awesome camera and I don't know the first thing about how to use it. If I don't use the flash, the pictures are almost always blurry. The flash is too bright. When I take a picture with the flash, it's too slow and I rarely "capture the moment." These are all things that I can adjust. I've just never figured out how. I'd like to take a class, or at the very least, go to a real camera shop and have someone explain it to me. I could also read the manual but I'm afraid I'd fall asleep before I got through the first explanation. So to demonstrate my incompetence, here are a series of pictures of William eating his dinner tonight. He was using his fork and was actually successfully spearing his food and putting it in his mouth. He was concentrating really hard and seemed very taken with his success. So I wanted to capture it on film. (I should have just hit the video function. I would have "captured" a lot more!)

So it starts off okay. He's a little dark because of the light behind him. But I like this picture.


Again, not too bad. At least it's not blurry.


It starts going downhill here. I can't seem to capture movement, and my timing is off. (Although you can see that the fork with the food on it actually makes it to his mouth!)


Here we see that I managed to focus on the background instead of William. This happens a lot, and I can never tell until I look at the picture on my computer.


And finally, again with the blurry action shot. I almost got a good shot of his pleased-as-punch expression.


So learning to use my camera will go on my list of 100 Things to Do in 100 Days! What's that, you ask? Laura at Laura's Mommy Journal started the idea, which is a spin-off of 101 Things to do in 1,001 Days. I'm jumping on the bandwagon and have started making my list. Starting tomorrow, I'll begin each post with the next item I've marked off the list. Should be exciting! So stay tuned.

Working Mom Challenges

There are many, many, many reasons why working full-time outside the home is tough. (It's all tough--working full-time at home, working part-time, being a SAHM--but since WOH is my experience, that's what I get to talk about. I certainly don't mean to imply that I have it tougher than anyone else!) The logistics of each workday--getting yourself ready, your child(ren) ready, figuring out dinner, household chores, etc., etc.; the desire to spend any non-working time with your child(ren), which often precludes personal or couple time, and then the guilt you feel when you do something on the weekend without your child, or the guilt you feel for not giving more attention to your spouse or doing more to nurture your marriage; the bone-tiredness you feel at the end of every day because you have been "on" for at least 16 hours--feeding your kids, dressing them, playing with them, making meals, cleaning up, cleaning dishes, doing laundry, cleaning bottles, making bottles, preparing lunches, paying bills, doing the million-odd-other household chores that have to get done every day, and, oh yeah, WORKING. If you're lucky, both you and your spouse are sharing these responsibilities, and you somehow manage to make conversation, laugh, make decisions, and enjoy each other in the midst of all of this.

My point is, there are never enough hours in the day (there probably wouldn't be if I didn't work, either) and working full time is hard. But one thing I'm finding to be particularly tough is finding organized activities for parents and babies that occur ON THE WEEKENDS. It seems like all the playgroups, story times, sing-alongs, etc. only happen during the week and are totally geared towards stay-at-home moms. I understand why--it's a huge market, and the people who teach or lead these "classes" or activities don't want to work on the weekends. But it would be nice for a library to hold a story hour for babies on a Saturday morning. And this would not only benefit working moms, but working dads, too. And I'm sure there are libraries that do this. I just haven't found any in my county. (And I do plan on trying to make this happen, btw.)

Also, in our area, it's very hard to find weekly "classes" on Saturdays or Sundays. There were very limited choices for Saturday swim classes (although there were some), and I'm finding the same thing in trying to enroll William in a singing or activity class (like Kindermusik or Gymboree or Little Gym). Gymboree only does weekday classes. And I only found one music class held on Saturdays, and it's a pretty good distance from my house. (In a different county.)

I guess the bigger question is, should I be filling our weekends with these kinds of activities? William gets circle time every day where they sing songs and read stories. And weekends are tough enough with trying to get together with friends, run errands, see family, and get chores done. But I want to experience those things with him. I want to see him get so excited for a book that he stands up to see. I want to see his eyes light up when we sing a song that he loves. This is what parents and their babies do, right?

The weekly music class that I found lasts for eight weeks and costs $122. That's a long commitment and a lot of money to spend on something he already does at daycare, and that I can do with him at home. I wish I could find something that happens once a month, on a Saturday or Sunday, that I can attend if I want, or not if I don't. And I could make it my life's mission to lobby our local library or county to offer something like this. But really--I hardly have enough energy to brush my teeth at the end of the day. Becoming an activist is not likely to happen.

I guess for now I'll think about it a little bit more. And maybe see if any of my friends want to do it, too. I doubt it, since most families travel a lot in the summer. That's another challenge for working moms--making time to get together with other moms with kids (and dads!). The weekends are always so filled that it's hard to make time to socialize. Anyway, I guess working parents are too busy to take classes with their kids on the weekends anyway. I'm still going to work on the Saturday story hour, though!

Slugging

There is a unique form of commuting in Washington, DC, called "slugging." Along I-95 and I-395--a major commuter route into the city--there are HOV-3 lanes, which are High Occupancy Vehicle lanes for cars carrying at least 3 passengers. It's meant to encourage carpooling. In order to take advantage of the HOV-3 lanes, people commuting into the city stop to pick up other passengers even though they are total strangers! However, slugging is a very organized system with its own set of rules, proper etiquette, and specific pickup and drop-off locations.

William and I have been picking up slugs in order to make our commute to work go faster. And I have to say, it hasn't been too bad! It still takes us around an hour door-to-door (a little longer in the mornings, usually), but it would probably take an hour and 20 minutes or more if we didn't pick up slugs. It's kind of weird driving into work with strangers, but so far, all of the slugs have been super nice and have enjoyed William. They've even tolerated Sesame Street and Raffi the few times I've had to play them.

I only need one passenger to meet the HOV requirements (since William counts!), but I've been taking two since I have the room. It's kind of nice to have someone sit in the back with William anyway, because that person tends to keep William entertained. The slugs probably get nervous when I start handing things to William from the front seat. One slug even doled out Cheerios to William almost the whole ride home. Drivers can sometimes get reputations among slugs for being reckless or unsafe, so I hope that doesn't happen to us. I can just hear the slugs in the slug line whispering to each other, "Oh--there's that minivan mom with the baby. Avoid her at all costs." It's okay for slugs to turn down a driver if they don't want to ride with him or her. It's also okay for a driver to turn down a slug.

The etiquette for slugging is pretty straightforward. No talking usually, but if there is conversation, it's initiated by the driver, not the slugs. No talking on your cell phone. (That goes for drivers and slugs.) No smoking or eating by driver or slug. Slugs don't request music or temp changes. And simple courtesy required.

Traffic is light during the summer, so I imagine the commute will be longer come September. But such is life. I've told Ed that we need to hurry up and have another baby so I won't have to pick up slugs. It's just as good a reason as any for having a baby, right? We can even nickname him or her, "Slug!"

Weekend Report

I have been negligent in my blog posts lately, but I'm sure you'll forgive me. Between trying to unpack at home and trying to work (imagine that) at work, blogging has taken a back seat. But I did want to take a minute to give an update.

William is cutting two new teeth on the bottom--on either side of his two middle teeth. These have been harder on him than his first six teeth were.

He's now taking baths in the big tub and loves it. I'm not sure why I didn't start this earlier, but you know how it is--you get in a groove sometimes and find it hard to change course. He does try to stand up a lot, but can be redirected pretty easily.

He says "hot" a lot, but I'm not sure he really knows what it means. He says it when he sees the stove or toaster oven or the grill--mostly because I say it. He'll figure it out soon enough. I guess his first "official" word is "bubble." He also says "Dada" more often now, but still no "Mama." I think he says other "words" that I don't understand yet, but I'm relieved that he's got a few words now.

He loves sprinklers and playing with the hose. He generally loves being outside, and prefers to push the stroller himself, rather than ride in it. It makes taking a walk slow-going. Not exactly the exercise it once was.

His new thing is sitting on things that are his height. He likes to turn around and sit down. So steps, ledges, and Mommy's lap are perfect for this. Any time I squat down, he immediately turns around and tries to sit on me.

He's eating more quantities these days, but still likes the old faithfuls--mac 'n' cheese, any kind of cheese, blueberries, watermelon (his new favorite), grapes, wagon wheel pasta (with Parmesan cheese), peas, broccoli (eating much more of that this week), goldfish, graham crackers, yogurt, applesauce, waffles, pancakes, and cinnamon toast. He's not much for meat, but will eat deli ham and turkey. I think I need to make a more organized effort to introduce new foods slowly and consistently, and one at a time. If he rejects something once, I tend to not make it again for a while, and I should probably try again several nights in a row with one new food.

He still loves his bottles and will drink a little bit out of sippy cups, but usually just uses the cups as projectile missiles. At daycare they usually give him a 4-oz. bottle of milk after a.m. snack (around 8:30 or 9:00 a.m.) and I think I'm going to have them try to drop this bottle. I don't think he needs it and can probably go without it pretty easily.

So that's about it for William. The house is coming along, slowly but surely. I managed to unpack a few more boxes today and got some things situated. I also managed to do a ton of laundry and put most of it away. We're getting there. Now if I can just get William healthy again, things will be great. His nose is still a faucet, and he's got this hacking cough now that's beginning to worry me. He does okay for most of the night, but once he wakes up, he ends up coughing and coughing and he can't go back to sleep and cries, so last night, I ended up sleeping with him from 4:30 a.m. until 6:30 a.m. We'll see if that happens tonight. And I know I keep saying this, but I promise I'll upload some pics of the new house soon. I just can't bring myself to post pictures of bare rooms with half-emptied boxes and piles of crap lying around. I'm sure you'll forgive me for that, too.

Are We There Yet?

I've moved lots of times and usually get everything in order pretty quickly. For some reason, this time around, it's just not happening. Could the reason possibly be that we have a toddler to look after now? It doesn't help that Ed's plan to spend Monday and Tuesday unpacking and getting stuff set up got derailed by getting locked out of the house on Monday, and by a sick toddler on Tuesday.

Yep--that's right. William is sick with something else now. He's been sick the entire month of June. Yesterday he had a fever all day and really loose poops. Aghhhhh! He didn't have a fever today and was in a much better mood--I stayed home with him today--although he still had several loose poops. Too bad--he's going back to daycare tomorrow. I feel so bad for him, though. That's what I get for feeling so hopeful that we were over the "hump" when he was so healthy in May. Never get complacent.

So anyway, back to the house. We have managed to unpack a lot of boxes, but we have a long way to go. I'm having a hard time figuring out where I want everything to go. I'm almost done arranging the kitchen, but I have a feeling I'll be changing things around a few times before all is said and done. And that's okay. I'm trying to keep a list of things we need to get (or things I'd like to get). I need things like welcome mats for the doors and a cutlery tray for my knives and a different garbage can and hooks for doors and side tables and window treatments and room darkening shades for William's room. And that's just a start. We'll get there, though. Mom is coming this weekend, so I think we'll be able to get a lot done.

William seems to love the new house. He's fully into destructive toddler mode, now, too. Today he pulled out about half of the CDs that Ed spent an hour organizing last night (while I unpacked two boxes). He also found my desk drawer filled with pens and spent a happy 20 minutes pulling them all out, putting them into various boxes around the room, handing them to me, and throwing them on the floor (while I was checking e-mail and trying to respond). And for even more entertainment, he thought it was great fun to drag the bag of garbage around the house, and even more fun to pull things out of the garbage bag and throw them over the gate onto the basement stairs. Luckily, the bag only had dry trash in it! So, he kept busy while I tried to unpack and put things away. We also went outside and talked to our next door neighbors after dinner. They are super nice and have a 3-year-old boy and a great dog named Sadie. William loved them both. It's nice to feel so comfortable with someone so quickly.

So that's about it. In my next post, I'll upload some pictures.

If You Live in a Condo and Have a Baby . . .

This post is inspired by Jennifer over at Playgroups are No Place for Children. She wrote this post and this post, both of which made me crack up. And of course, the original genesis comes from If You Give a Mouse a Cookie by Laura Numeroff.

If you live in a condo and have a baby, you're going to feel cramped very quickly and you'll start looking for a house.

If you start looking for a new house, you're going to find a house you like in the suburbs but you won't like the long commute that you'll have to make to get to work.

If you won't like the long commute that you'll have to make to get to work, you're going to tell your husband you'll move there if he buys you a mac daddy, front loader, high efficiency washer and dryer.

If you tell your husband you'll move there if he buys you a mac daddy, front loader, high efficiency washer and dryer, your husband is going to want to spend as little money as possible.

If your husband will want to spend as little money as possible, he's going to find a great deal on a used Kenmore Elite HE3t washer and dryer.

If your husband finds a great deal on a used Kenmore Elite HE3t washer and dryer, he's going to have to pick it up, move it into your new house, and install it himself.

If your husband picks up, moves, and installs the previously-owned-but-new-to-you washer and dryer himself, he's going to need the wire cutters that he left at the old house to cut the vent tubing for the dryer.

If your husband needs the wire cutters that he left at the old house to cut the vent tubing for the dryer, he's going to go outside to the shed to look for something to cut the dryer tubing with.

If your husband goes outside to the shed to look for something to cut the dryer tubing with, he's going to not realize that the new glass sliding door is tricky and locks if the mechanism is flipped the wrong way.

If your husband doesn't realize that the new glass sliding door is tricky and locks if the mechanism is flipped the wrong way, he's going to lock himself out of the new house with nothing but his blackberry.

If your husband locks himself out of your new house with nothing but his blackberry, he's going to try to shimmy the garage door to see if he can force it open.

If your husband shimmies the garage door to try to force it open, your garage door opener is not going to open the garage when you come home with your son 3 hours later because your husband managed to lock it when he messed with it.

If your garage door opener does not open the garage when you come home with your son 3 hours later because your husband managed to lock it when he messed with it, you, your son, and your husband are going to be locked out of the house in 90-plus degree weather at 5:00 p.m.

If you, your son, and your husband are locked out of the house in 90-plus degree weather at 5:00 p.m., you're going to tell your husband to call a locksmith and pay whatever the hell it costs to get everyone in the house.

If your husband calls a locksmith, you're going to have to wait for 45 minutes for the locksmith to get there.

If the locksmith gets there and spends another 45 minutes trying to get the front door unlocked, he's going to eventually say that he can't get it open, and he'll have to try the garage door because it's an easier mechanism.

If the locksmith finally gets the garage door unlocked and opened at 7:15 p.m., your husband is going to have to pay him $130.

If your husband has to pay the locksmith $130, your husband is going to be in a bad mood for the rest of the night, but he will never again give you shit for losing your keys or locking yourself out of the house, especially since you never once gave him shit even though you were in your work clothes and had to entertain a one-year-old outside in 90-degree heat for 2 hours.

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So that was our evening folks! The move went well, we're getting settled, we've got Internet hook-up and Ed's getting the entertainment center hooked up downstairs as we speak. William loves the new place (especially outside--he had a blast tonight), and Clark is getting used to it, too. More posts and pictures to come. But it's late and I'm going to bed now.

The Nebulizer

I had to buy a nebulizer today. Yesterday when I picked William up from daycare, it sounded like he was wheezing. He had an okay night (still woke up at 5:25 a.m. for the day, but at least that was a little later than the previous two days), but this morning I took him to the doctor and sure enough, he's wheezing. Since this is his second episode, we went ahead and bought a nebulizer. I have to give him treatments this weekend and we go back on Monday to see how he is. So needless to say, I stayed home with William today.

I had a dentist appointment and William had to come with me because Ed couldn't miss work. William was not too happy to see a woman wearing a mask doing stuff to my mouth. I had him in his stroller in a corner of the room and he couldn't really see my face when the chair was reclined. At first he was wary, but he ate cheerios and drank his bottle and he was okay. But about halfway into the cleaning, he started crying and luckily, another nurse came in and held him so he could see me. He was so tired that he rested his head on the nurse's shoulder while he watched me. The nurses laughed, though, because he never took his eyes off of me, and he clung to his empty bottle the whole time and wouldn't let it go. Poor guy. He is without a doubt a mamma's boy. I thought he was starting to get over his separation anxiety because for the last several mornings at daycare, he hasn't cried when I left. But maybe he's not as over it as I thought.

So, other than William being sick, I'm feeling stressed about the pending move. Ed keeps reminding me that we don't have to be out of our condo until the end of June so it's not the end of the world if we don't get every single thing packed and moved this weekend. It's nice to have that extra time. Still, I look around and the place is a wreck, and there are still so many things that haven't been packed and we've run out of boxes and there are a million details I need to remember before tomorrow night. We're spending the night at Ed's parents tomorrow night and they'll be watching William on Saturday while we move, so I need to pack all his "stuff." How can something so small require so much crap?

Anyway, I probably won't blog again until Sunday at the earliest. So wish us luck! Hopefully I'll be able to come back and say the move went well and William loves the new place and Clark hasn't flipped out entirely yet. (He might be close, though. I think he hates disorder more than Ed!)

Letter to William

Dear William,

I know that the sun has been peeking over the horizon earlier and earlier these days. And I love it that we're getting to spend an extra hour together in the morning. And I think it's great that you're so cheerful at such an early hour. But really William, 5:00 a.m.? To start the day? Is that really a good idea? I'm not sure if you've realized that it takes AT LEAST another hour for mommy and daddy to morph into the pleasant, loving, and patient parents that you have come to know. So maybe tomorrow, if you wake up at 5:00 a.m., even if you see a little daylight outside, maybe after I give you your bottle you could just roll over and go back to sleep for another hour. I promise you that sleep is NOT overrated, despite what you might think.

Oh yeah--one more thing. One of the advantages of being a working mom is that I usually don't have to change your poopy diapers during the week. You save those for your daycare teachers. I don't know what they've been telling you, but it's really okay for you to wait until you get to daycare to do your business. But if you absolutely can't wait and HAVE to poop on a weekday morning, can you just let me know when you're all finished. Changing THREE poopy diapers in one morning before we even leave the house just does not bode well for the rest of the day.

Okay--that's all for now. I hope that we can work together to iron out these little kinks in our daily schedule. I love you to pieces!

Love,
Mommy

Countdown to Moving Day

We move in five days. I'm excited about the new house, but mostly, I just want to get the move over with. Tonight, Ed asked me if I was going to miss our current place. I said that I will miss the location, but not so much the condo. But then he added, "Our first home as a married couple," and I suddenly got a little nostalgic. Even though it's a condo with a very small kitchen, it really has been a great home for us. Lots of room for two people, and it hasn't even been all that bad with three.

I wonder if William has any idea that something is going on. He sees us putting things in boxes. He sees that there aren't things on shelves anymore. There are boxes EVERYWHERE. I'm really curious to see how he'll react to the move. I plan to get his room completely unpacked and set up on Saturday so that he'll at least feel a little bit "at home." We'll see what happens.

Speaking of William, he had a decent day at daycare. He didn't sleep well last night, but he ate pretty well today. After he went to sleep tonight, I went to Babies R Us and bought a water play table. It was on sale for $19.99 so I couldn't pass it up. I'm tempted to try to set it up tomorrow after work, but Ed would probably kill me. Maybe William and I will just head to the pool instead. We need to take advantage of the pool while we're here.

That's about here. Here are links to pictures of the new house, in case you missed them: Outside, first floor, and second floor and basement. I'm off to bed now. Maybe William will sleep better tonight. A girl can dream, right?

Water Play

Things were better today and William ate a little more than he has been eating. For breakfast he ate french toast (at least half a piece, which was pretty good) and blueberries. Later in the morning, he ate applesauce and cheerios. For lunch he ate a piece of American cheese, a little bit of shredded cheddar cheese, and half an avocado. We went to a friend's party in the afternoon and he ate a few bites of watermelon, one graham cracker square, two bites of a cookie, and he drank water. And for dinner, he ate wagon wheel pasta (maybe 8 or so pieces of pasta?) and peas and another piece of American cheese. And he totaled 20 ounces of milk for the day (and that includes the 3:30 a.m. bottle). I'm not real crazy about him loving the American cheese, but it's not the worst thing in the world. I think I'll try some cheddar slices or maybe mozzarella or muenster. At least those aren't quite so processed. Still a no-go on meat. I tried turkey deli meat and chicken and he wouldn't eat either.

Here's a cute picture from earlier in the day. I like that it shows all his teeth. Would have been a great picture if I hadn't cut off his head. Oh well--it's still cute.

And another one that shows all of his head: (and Clark in the background)


Anyway, William had a good time at the party. He spent most of the time playing with the buckets filled with ice, water, and drinks. He took ice from one bucket and threw it into another bucket. He pulled out drinks and dropped them back into the ice. He splashed in the cold water. When I finally opened a water bottle and shared it with him, he took it over and drank from it by himself (spilling water all over himself in the process) and then spent a long time putting a straw in the bottle and trying to get it back out again. Loads of fun. Here's a picture of him and Ed. Don't mind the snotty nose. (As per usual!)


After we got home, I took William to the pool. He spent almost the entire time we were there sitting beside the filter trap (which is a hole next to the pool with a lid--it has a filter screen at the very bottom. Water gets sucked into it from the pool and then gets circulated back to the pool after being filtered). He took the lid off and put it back on and then played with buckets and other toys in the water. We didn't actually play in the baby pool until the last 10 minutes or so.

And finally, during his bath, he was enthralled with holding toys, the squirt bottle, and the wash cloth under the water and them holding them up and watching the water run off of them. He did this over and over and over. Fascinating.

So all of this has led me to decide that we need a water play table. (Like we need a hole in our heads, Ed would say. He's not a big fan of yard junk.) I envision long stretches of afternoons spent flipping through magazines and enjoying my sweet tea while William plays at the water table. Now don't dash my fantasies! I'm well aware that chances are, as soon as we get the water table, William will have moved on to bubbles or sidewalk chalk or the cozy coupe. In the meantime, I'm scouring Craig's List and sale ads!

Better Days

William was much better today, so I'm hoping we're done with this "phase." He still isn't eating much. We'll see how it goes this weekend with cutting back on the milk. If he does well, then I think I'll send him to daycare with smaller bottles. I usually send him to daycare with 3 bottles--a 4-oz. that he drinks after breakfast, and 2 6-oz. that he drinks after lunch and at snack time. I think I'll try to make all 3 bottles 4 oz. (He also still takes a bottle before bed, and he wakes up once in the night for a bottle.) I'd like him to drop the afternoon bottle, but on the weekends, that's the one he seems to "need" the most. So I hesitate to push him to drop that one at daycare.

My other alternative is to push harder for him to give up the middle-of-the-night bottle. He'll keep waking up, though, if I don't give him that bottle, and maybe if I just stick it out and keep putting him back to bed without feeding him, he'll finally drop it. But his pediatrician said to give it to him (all pediatricians are different, of course, but I LOVE ours so I tend to trust her) and I just don't think I can suffer through however many nights it would take to get him to drop it altogether.

It's late and I'm not making much sense. Basically, I have a hard time tackling several problems at once, even though all the issues are interrelated, and a multi-pronged approach probably makes more sense. (The problems being attached to bottles, drinking too much milk, waking up at night, and not eating solids.) I tend to want to isolate each issue and deal with it separately. I also believe, however, that something will give at some point that will help resolve these issues. Whether it's me reaching my breaking point, or William experiencing some kind of breakthrough, I guess only time will tell!

One of Those Days

Well, this whole week hasn't exactly gotten off on the right foot. Today was one of those days that I really wish I could stay at home with William. I went to his classroom at 11:45 because I had forgotten my lunch, and when I got there, William was bawling and the teachers said he had been cranky all morning. He was crying so hard he had red spots all over his face. He calmed down when I picked him up and he got his bottle. I think he was both tired and hungry. When I left he was eating his lunch, but he wasn't very happy to see me go.

Then, at 2:30, I get a call from his teacher that he woke up from his nap screaming and they didn't know what else to do with him. Part of me was annoyed because I wanted to say, "Have you tried holding him?" But I know they're busy and short-staffed right now and that's a huge disadvantage of using a daycare center--they can't drop everything to pay exclusive attention to my child. So I left work and picked him up. He was crying pretty hard when I got there but calmed down as soon as I picked him up. He seemed okay, but I went ahead and took him to the doctor's office anyway, just to rule out an ear infection. The doctor couldn't find anything wrong with him, which is a good thing, but I just ended the day feeling a little down. He's a little needy right now, for whatever reason, and my instinct is to give him lots of reassurance, but I also want to encourage his independence, and I hate the whining. It's just one of those weeks when I feel like I'm doing everything wrong.

I hope he sleeps well tonight and has a better day tomorrow. Me, too, for that matter. To end on a sweet note, when we got home this afternoon, we went downstairs so I could change my clothes. I turned the TV on and Sesame Street was on. William is usually not interested in TV at all, but he must have been pretty tired because he just lay on my bed, holding his blanket, and watched TV for about 5 minutes. I lay down beside him and he came over to me and lay his head on my chest and we just snuggled for a few minutes. It was a nice "moment" in an otherwise lousy day.

Eating: The Next Challenge

Just when you think you're in a groove, your child will start doing something that brings you to the brink all over again. For me, our issue has become food. On the outside, I'm being very nonchalant about it--offering lots of choices, letting him out of his chair when he clearly doesn't want to eat, serving him food that I know he will eat. I know he won't starve. Food will not become a battle in our house, so while I will be creative when it comes to making sure we eat healthy, I will not beg, cajole, or bribe my kids into eating.

That said, IT'S DRIVING ME CRAZY!!!! What am I doing wrong? Why is he so completely not into food? He would be content to stay on a liquid diet for the rest of his life. This morning he wouldn't even eat bananas. And tonight he ate a few peas, but really hardly any. Yesterday he left blueberries on his tray. What gives? Tonight I made ravioli with spaghetti sauce, and he wouldn't even try it. His teacher said they had rice at lunch and William picked some up, studied it for a while and rubbed it in his fingers and hands, and then threw a big bunch at Michael, who fortunately thought this was the funniest thing in the world.

He's had days where he has eaten quite a bit, but those days are few and far between. He's not too crazy about juice. He doesn't like ice cream. He won't eat carrots or sweet potatoes or squash. For a short time he would eat chicken, but not anymore. He wouldn't eat those Gerber meat sticks. He usually likes peas, cheese, blueberries, bananas, avocados, macaroni and cheese, sometimes broccoli, applesauce, waffles with applesauce, and cinnamon toast. And he likes Cheerios. He seems to eat a lot of things at school that he won't eat at home.

Anyway, once again, I have a hard time accepting that this is just part of his personality, or just a phase, and not some shortcoming on my part. I feel like maybe I'm not feeding him at the right times, or maybe I'm not preparing the food the right way. Or maybe I'm offering too much or not enough. Or I'm not being consistent. I know I'm over analyzing. But nothing brings out my insecurities more than my child! I guess what worries me is that we're down to one last scoop of formula, so now he's on whole milk, and he won't be getting the same nutrients from his liquid diet. He needs to eat more solids now. And we need to cut back on how much milk he drinks. Which hasn't been too hard at home, but it's hard for them at daycare. Maybe once we consistently cut back on the milk, he'll start eating more solids.

Well, enough whining. We're having an okay week so far. William's nose is still goopy, but he's been sleeping pretty well. I think I'm battling a sinus infection, but I'm hoping it will go away soon. We're still packing--a little every night. Still working on downloading songs to my iPod. So that's it for now. Nothing thrilling--just a baby that won't eat and two tired parents.

Weekend Report

Sunday night is here and it's time for the weekend report. When I last left you, we had had a successful and fun-filled trip to the pool, and although William had a head cold, it was nothing serious. He was waking up more often at night and giving me a hard time about going back to sleep in his crib. But on Friday, he had a great day at daycare. They had water play day (which will be every Friday throughout the summer, weather permitting) and apparently, William had a blast. The school sets up a water table, and a sprinkler, and a pool for the older kids. William managed to play in all three and his teachers said he really loved the pool with the older kids. I was so relieved to hear he had a great day.

As far as his sleep goes, Thursday and Friday nights were rough, and Saturday morning, he woke up at 5:15 a.m. (after having kept me awake from 2:00 a.m. to almost 3:00 a.m.) FOR THE DAY. AGHHHHH! He was tired by 9:00 a.m., but only took a 30-minute nap, so there was no nap for me. Oh well. We went to the pool later that morning and William had a great time walking around the baby pool, playing with lots of toys, and watching the other kids. On Saturday afternoon, we went to the big playground and William managed to play on everything--the slides, swings, sand. He even found an inflatable ball that he chased all over the place. We met a really cute 5-year-old girl who told me that William was really cute, and that she used to be cute, too, but now that she was older, sometimes in the morning, she was mean to her older brother because he was really annoying. I told her I could completely relate, what with having 2 older brothers and all. She asked me if I liked them and I said sometimes. She seemed to think that was a good answer.

At any rate, I guess our busy day wore William out because he slept pretty well on Saturday night. He didn't wake up until 4:15, which is his usual m.o. (after going down at 7:15). But he woke up at 5:45 a.m., and since I absolutely did not want to start my day at 5:45 a.m., I lay down with him in his bed and we both slept until 7:00. Probably not a good idea to lay down with him in his bed, but seriously--I DID NOT want to start my day at 5:45 a.m. Sometimes--no, most of the time--the desire for sleep prevails.

So anyway, today turned out to be a yucky, rain-filled day, which was just our luck because today was the day the Ed and I and his sister and brother-in-law chose to take Ed's dad and mom to the Nationals' baseball game. (This was his dad's birthday gift.) Bummer. The game wasn't rained out, though, so we all went anyway. Our original seats were not under cover, but we just found some empty seats that were, and we actually had a great time. William was really good. He enjoyed all the sights and sounds. He played in his seat, played with straws, took sips of Pepsi and lemonade, and got to walk around the concourse a few times. After the seventh inning stretch, he got a bottle, and that kept him going to the end. The rain didn't bother him one bit!

Unfortunately, I'm a huge ding-dong and forgot the camera. So I couldn't capture William's first major league baseball game, but Ed's sister had hers. She still uses a film camera, though, so it may be a while before I see those pictures. But at least she took some! Dumb dumb mommy. How could I forget the camera. Oh well. So now it's Sunday night, bottles are made, lunches for tomorrow are made, William's sheets and blanket are by the door, I've got one more load of clothes in the dryer, and then it's lights out. Whew! Two more weeks until we move. (Just one more weekend!) We didn't get much packing done this weekend, but I'm hoping for a productive week. So that's it for the weekend report. Lots of good family time which is such a nice thing. Nothing's better than being with my two favorite guys!